I felt compelled to share yesterday’s doodles with you today, and it ended up being an essay on taking the concept of being ‘in flow’ a whole lot deeper than what it might appear to be on the surface. I have tried to shorten it, but it wants to be said.
A few of you have done a free ‘Doodle Playdate” with me recently, and I encouraged you to post your doodles here, and tell us if you gained any insights, or how the process was for you.
But no-one has done that, and I’m wondering why.
I know … when we have to put ourselves ‘out there’ we feel vulnerable because we might open ourselves up to criticism.
But do you know what I’ve learnt over the years? I AM MY OWN HARSHEST CRITIC.
When I am being critical of myself, it stops my flow. It halts any progress. It causes tension in my body and depletes my energy. And nothing gets done. All movement stops.
Can anyone relate?
When I move past that, and let go of that critical voice in my head, magic happens. I have so many stories to share on this. I’m sure you do too.. you know, those moments in life where you have let go of ‘trying so hard’ to get something done ‘perfectly’ and when all struggle and resistance is gone, things just fall into place, as if by magic, with little effort on your part.
What I know to be true is that when we let go of ideas of how things ‘should’ be, and stop ‘shoulding’ on ourselves, we get things done more efficiently and with more love for ourselves – which ultimately means we stop ‘shoulding’ on others and love others better. And this is where I see the concept of ‘being in flow’ ending up – how it makes the world a place of more love.
The invitation here is to experiment with moving past your own self-criticism, and the fear of being judged by others, because this private FB group is a place of non-judgment.
Note: non-judgment in this space means – not even saying things like ‘ that is amazing, or that’s so beautiful, or so good’. Non-judgment means accepting things as they are, purely for the sake of their existence. The words we use in our Intuitive Creativity processes, and in our Kahuna Bodywork trainings, go like this:
“When I look at your drawing/doodle/painting/work of art/ experience your massage, I feel____________________
Or I sense __________________
Or, it makes me feel _______________________,
Or , I see _________________________,
Or ‘What is working for me is___________________”
The response is spoken from my own experience, with no reference to the other person’s experience or intention. Profound insights are gained by all when we respond (not react) to something from our own experience.
So I’m kicking off this ‘doodle sharing’ post with two doodles I did yesterday.
I forced myself to stop doing anything screen-related and instead, caught up on some motivational, spirit-inspiring talks I’d been wanting to listen to. As I listened, I doodled. I was surprised by the first one – the lines – as it is something I have never ever done before. If you know my doodles, they are always more like the second one. But it was like a meditation as I focused intently on my hand, the spaces between the lines, and what Carolyn Myss was saying in the talk. I can remember clearly today what she was talking about. (improved learning and memory retention is one of the benefits of doodling, by the way)
The second doodle is more like my usual ones, but still, very different kinds of marks to what I usually do.
When I doodle these days, or paint or draw, there is no judgment or criticism now, from my mind, because I have learnt that these are just expressions of a moment in time. They mean nothing,unless I give them meaning.They might make me feel calm while doing them, but they might evoke tension in someone else. My doodles always do that to Warren, my husband. He does not ‘like’ them at all, because they make him feel chaotic. But that’s okay – he doesn’t have to like them. I don’t have to like them.
This is not about whether or not you or anyone else ‘likes’ them. Nor is it about interpreting or giving meaning to what comes out onto the page. (no therapizing)
Imagine if you were to comment on other people’s artwork or doodles or any output using the Non-Judgment Guidelines above.
How freeing does it feel to imagine that no one has to like what you create? And noone is going to tell you what you are feeling / thinking/ being, or how you should be processing any of it.
How does it feel to remain curious about your process, and fascinated by what your hand puts out on to the page? And by extension, learning to remain curious and fascinated by your thoughts, choices and your life.?
And how wonderful does it feel to be curious about your responses to another’s output, without needing to have an opinion or an answer for them, but just to observe, witness and respond from your own heart, knowing you won’t be made to feel ‘wrong’ because it is your experience?
I share this with you today, because, I believe that to be ‘in flow’, we have to clear out the muck that is causing blockages all the time. … and the muck comes and goes … so it is a constant practice. There are so many ways to do this – doodling is just one way.
You can share in the comments here, or if you are a member of the ‘Finding Our Flow” Private FB Group Page, please share there, or apply to become a member.
Answer these two questions:
- do you relate to being your own harshest critic?
- what did you/ do you gain from doodling? ( if you’ve doodled)